Friday, August 9, 2019

Raffle Bike Madness

Raffle waffle madness is all the rage these days (2018-2019) so these bro dudes are getting super horny when they get elected to build a bike for Born Free People's Choice, build some wacky ass long chopper, over over engineered yet under reliable, or sometimes decently classy build. They show up to Born Free, do a burn out in a baby pool with their new bike, pour some 805 beer (The New Pabst)down the exhaust and then after a weekend of shenanigans, they realize they refinanced their home to build the worlds greatest knucklehead, for the weekend. So what can they do to recoup their loses from buying a freddys springer, chemical candy paint, 90 gallons of bondo, wacky ass vintage seat,etc. ????? Have a raffle of course ya dummy!!! Here's the usual heist: (1)Post cool picture of your bike at the last bad boi motorcycle run you won a dinky ass trophy at, or honorable mention or whatever (2)Tell em what yer selling, "Hey guys, the time has come for me to get rid of ol_______ my teen choice award winner @ bad boi run 3, it's a 1938 rare________ Harley with over $20,000 worth of paint, chrome, bondo, swampmeet shit etc." (3)State the rules: We are ONLY selling 400 tickets for $150 and we will pull the winner live on Instagram. Buyer doesn't have to be present to win, ship's on his dime, 2nd place winner gets $100 gift card, 3rd place gets a trucker hat with my stupid companies logo on it. For some reason, there is always enough suckers to collectively meet these fuckers absurd price demands, some clown wins a hundred dollar panhead, and all is well in the world right? Sure, I don't give a fuck, but at the end of the day, you still got a clown pulling a hustle that is looking pretty tired. The first one or two, I was like, " Ah dang, that's kinda dope!" but then after the 3rd, 4th, 8th one, I was like, "Alright, these fuckers saw a recipe, and are rolling with it", regardless of what the shit is really worth. To all raffle waffle boyz out there that ended up here, reading this post and feel called out, are you raffling your shit for what it could actually sell for to one person? or are you using the stupidity and collectivism or a bunch of "Dreamers" to sell your absurdly over-priced, and under inspired chopper? first raffle boy to call me a liar and state why, gets a waffle, but it's a raffle though. You guys are a sham, but hey, sell that 50k AMF shovelhead with a revtech trans and an eBay headlight. more power to you asshole.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

Still holding strong to my views on "THE SCENE"

Over 15 years into the game, and certain things still get on my nerves. The cool kids and the Johnny-come-lately type of mother fuckers who show up, make some heavy observations, then try to crank the street creds knob to 11. These are the guys who drink pabst on a Friday night while scanning through old ass "In the Wind" magazines saying, "Bro, look at this rowdy mother fucker" while his homie gives himself a stick and poke tattoo of a dagger and the saying, "This machine kills Fascist" or something gnar to the gnar-gnar. These dudes buy filthy tweaker ass pans and knucks, pay another hipster to rip into the motor and get it running somewhat decent (but not too good, because they need it to breakdown for epic roadside repair stories and tweets) they use only the filthiest, and rarest of parts, nothing is cleaned or put together with any regards for over all aesthetics, as long as its sixties wacky style and not reliable or newer than 1970 something. They usually get featured in DiCE a few times, start a company that features black T's and vintage band shirts that their FIDM drop out girlfriends cut up and charge an extra 60 bucks for. They also sell beer koozies that say stuff about tits and pussies, or fuck you! type rowdiness.These jack-a-lopes are the funniest, because they literally go from zero to hero in a matter of years, just from hanging out at the right bars, and clanking booze with the right photographers, and bro-ing out to the same vintage beaver from playboy September of '72 while wearing jeans that they choose not to wash to smell the same way as their smelly friends.
Now for the "Babes" uprising, these broads are feeling super empowered because they can meet in a desert once a year and swing their tits around while singing Lana Del Rey. Did I mention they trailer their Honda rebel 250's from Texas to these So-Cal events because they actually don't know how to ride?!?!?! And if they do ride, their bikes are exactly the same as their scrawny boyfriends, but the rebel or xs 650 version. Funny part is, these Girls have boy bodies, and their boyfriends are built like 3rd world county girls who haven't eaten a carb in 3 years. What a neat juxtaposition! go Bruce Gender with your she-dick!
Now for my favorite, the "Go fund me" biker, these goof balls post their biker poetry on social media, with pictures of sunsets and close-ups of feathers and swap meet quality bone handle hunting knives, and write about how outrageous and rude they are when they pass through a bar somewhere in small town America, they pour beer on their heads and pop wheelies into juke boxes like Charlie Sheen in that shit 90's biker/cop movie. But luckily for us, they ride around on unreliable, unmaintained bikes with no brakes, and usually end up sliding head first into peoples cars or try to run a yellow with their slug ass bike and get t-boned, and because spooly fronts are the jam, they slam into shit because their juice-drum is comparable to dragging a stick. Best part about these rebel souls? they are so free from societies chains that they only work as a coffee shop barista long enough to fund their trips to grassroots chopper shows half way across the country, then get crushed up. So their homies post a "GO-Fund Me" for this crumbled up free spirit friend who has NO INSURANCE and asks all the internet social media friends to help their road dog out, because he's a good guy. Thank you internet biker for letting me live vicariously through you and your posts, thank you for your outlaw poetry, I cant wait to donate a huge portion of my check to your next bike that I get to read about you destroying! I hate having to work and have insurance and having to "go fund myself"
Anywho, this post was for documenting the evolution of bikers, I'm keeping tabs for future generations to read and see what these clowns were really about, PS- I wear skinny jeans and have a beard and also wear vans and eat gluten free humus while riding a fixie bike. I also wear a $130 levis jacket but that's because it fits oh-so nice and I saw Vin Diesel wearing one like it.

Monday, December 28, 2015

Rewind Part 1

Here are a few sets of pictures from the past, boy does time fly! chopper time, family fun, and good friends! Silliness ahoy!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Rewind part 2

Rewind part 3

End of the year flash back.... these pictures aren't all from 2015 though, just a flash back of pictures I wanna share

Tuesday, October 27, 2015

That's whats up!!!

My old internet acquaintance just shot me an email that REALLY got me stoked, I'll copy the email and let y'all read it. shit like this keeps me rollin' .....and even though I'm a smart ass online sometimes, I usually will bend over backwards to help someone out with tech/fab tips. I want to promote safe and cool looking shit while helping homies avoid a lot of the speed bumps I've had to encounter. This dude made my fuckin day man. I love hardcore homebuilt choppers, and appreciate the bad mother fuckers willing to lend an ear when it comes to tips and tricks, and I REALLY appreciate a homie that can give props and continue to try to excel at their craft. Ride on brother, keep choppin, and shoot me an e-mail if you ever need another set of eyes to solve a problem! Anyone can e-mail me at if they think they need a hand, or have a tip I could use!!!
He wrote: Not sure if you remember or not but we hooked up off the JJ a couple years ago and you sent me a shit ton of pictures of your bike and how to mount that rear fender and things. I have the twinkie fat boy that I was sort of using your bike as an example for where I wanted to go with it. Anyway it's pretty much done and in it's "natural state of evolution" or "digression" or whatever you call it. I was just running through some old links on my computer this morning and ran across the kingdeadbeat blog. I know you had pulled away from it for a while a couple years ago and was surprised to see the post in September about all the bikes you've built, had a hand in building, parts, or whatever. Well I wanted to send a picture of "your mom" as she sits now because it's heavily influenced by your bike and the other ideas I've seen come out over the years. It's hilarious because in Mississippi here there is a VERY modest "chop cult" so to speak. Mostly big baggers with giant displacement, chrome, loud radios and 26-31 inch front tires and tons of chrome and did I say chrome? Anyway the guys I ride with always laugh because I can park mine in the middle of $350,000 worth of bikes and NO ONE looks at them, asks questions about them. They flock to mine. Fist question is ALWAYS "you build this?" second invariably is "you need some padding on that seat", third is " I used to ride a hard tail, until I got smart and bought a bagger". (it fucks them up when I say it's more comfortable than your bagger, it's a softail, and it's a twin cam.... that I've put 89,000+ miles on as she sits.) anyway after reading the blog post I thought you left out one catagory... "bikes you inspired". So here's a southern build west coast inspired dandy for you. "your mom". hope things are well sir. m specs: 2001 FLSTFC Akront aluminums with drop center star hubs, twisted spoke 18"x5.75" rear, 16'x3.5" Peanut tank 34 Farmall tractor spotlight, with updated internals flat fender boat trailer rear fender hand made clip ons Motor: stock 88B Andrews 57 cams Redline adjustable pushrods stock 40mm CV carb feuling solid state 3-5 psi fuel pump port matched and flowed heads (done the old school way in my garage with a water hose and a lot of prayers) Never dynoed it but let's just say there are guys with 30K+ in their 125 cu in bagger cvo motors that are real fucking surprised when they are looking at your mom's big fat ass pulling away from them..... :-D Anyway - thanks for the advice, inspiration and being cool enough to take some time to point me in the right direction. Keep up the good work Mr. Santos

Friday, September 4, 2015

Memories and Updates

Here is a small post showing some of the bikes I've built, helped build, donated parts to, influenced, been influenced by, I may have made one part, maybe just painted, or built completely (aside from Harley doing the motors and a few non aesthetic components)These belong to friends mostly, some acquaintances, and some strictly customers. I have learned a lot over the years, with help and influence from people. I'm proud to say I've built and help build some pretty righteous bikes, I enjoy riding mine with my friends too. I may edit this post down the road and add pix, or maybe do a part 2 as I find more older projects I may have forgot about.-DESCRIPTION WILL BE ABOVE BIKE PICTURE, I MAY HAVE MISEED SOME DETAILS ABOUT EACH BUILD, OR LEFT EM OUT BECAUSE ITS OBVIOUS- Tony's build: Its currently in the build process, but will have a 23" front, 18" rear, rewire, redtail leather seat, custom exhaust, one-off sissy bar, modded gas tank, side mount coil, ribbed fender, custom bars, hella headlight, titmouse taillight, and a slew of other shit, more pix to come, this should be one of my nicest builds hopefully!!!
Rob's build: one-off bars (gifted from Dakotas build) mounted a tank, mounted vintage sissybar, headlight mounts, rewire, chopped OEM fender, side mount coil & speedo, taillight mount, aircleaner.
Dakota's build: modded a coffin tank, rewire, one-off seat, aircleaner, side mount coil & speedo, flip rear fender, modded old vintage sissy bar to fit.
Honda shadow build Tank mount, indian scout rear fender & brackets, exhaust, one-off seat, bars.
Holly's sporty build: (in the works) 21" front w painted calipers, fairing, clip-ons, modded sporty tank, rear fairing, custom exhaust, one off aluminum oil bag, extended swing arm, rear shock mounts flipped, side mount coil etc.
Steve's Death Stalker sporty build version 1 : modded alien tank, one-off bars,dual headlight mount, rewire, side mount coil, one-off seat, sissy bar, rear feder, custom exhaust
version2 Steve and Petey went up and out on the frame, 7" over front end, 23" front wheel etc. ...still in the works
Boris' Kawasaki build: black out wheels, tank mount, one-off bars, seat mount, (2) rear fender configurations, some rewire, aircleaner, side mount speedo, soon to mod exhaust
Fern's 1st softail 21" front, de-tinned front end, headlight, mid controls, one-off seat pad, rear fender, custom exhaust
Fern Dogg's 2nd softail same shit as 1st, headlight mounts- 23" front wheel, tank, mids and jockey to come
Vital's Santanico Panimonium 6" over front, shaved lowers, modded tank, rewire, sidemount coils, one-off seat, modded OEM rear fender, sissy bar,exhaust, etc.
Cousin Joey's sporty: Hardtail rear section welded on, ribbed rear fender w sissy bar, seat mounted, custom exhaust, mounted and modded tank, rewire,etc....this bike went from Cali to Missouri for its maiden voyage with no problems!!!
Mark's Iron Giant softail One-off seat, exhaust, rewire, side mount coil, mid pegs, jockey shift and lever, mount rear fender, sissy bar & taillight mount, lower leg shave, all by me. (tank & bars by other local fabricators) bike has since been to a professional frame builder, a 23" front wheel has been assembled, new headlight was spray painted & mounted, and a few pairs of bars have been made by my buddy Burd, I also think the rake and trail has been redone via front ends and triple trees via High Desert Performance.
One configuration of my bike
Brother Kris Sherry's sporty: Built 100% by Kris, he used some DEADBEAT MFG. bars, and I think they look killer, good job brother!
Crusher's moto sporty modded BMX bars, side mount coil, sissy bar, one off seat, chopped OEM fender, rewire, hes done exhaust, jockey, mids, and a few other things since this pic.
Did this for a local dude Edgar, he wanted clean and simple, cool ass dude! painted wheels & calipers, DB MFG bars, modded tank, one-off seat, chopped OEM fender, strutted, rewired, aircleaner, side mount coil, custom exhaust etc.
Little Danny's bike mounted tank, paint & pinstripe, chopped fender, other little shit he banged out on it
Jesus Nate's sporty chopped OEM fender, struts, side mount coil (hose clamp style lol) rewire, seat mount, etc
Lucas' Bike (Formerly Mark's) mounted rear fender, extended swing arm (me and HDP) side mount license plate, tail light mount, oil bag mount w rear covers, rewire, mount a modded tank, mounted seat, 21" front, headlight mount, etc
My buddy Mike's bike tank mount, seat mount, sissy bar, exhaust (never got to clean em up)
Risky's bike Helped with a few things on this, he banged out a ton, he let me get down bg time on the stripe (not pictured)
Yodanny's bike one-off pipes, seat mount, fender and sissybar mount (bad luck w this one) tank mount, air cleaner, maybe a few other things...
Jeremy's sporty, paint, tank mount, bars, mounted the aid cleaner, maybe pipes. Slim's fab did the rear fender, hardtail, sissybar, and oil bag, & seat
As I said, I have done a lot of work on a lot of these bikes, NOT all of the work on all of these bikes, some completely avoided the chopping block and my hand, but for anyone claiming to be a bike builder, or saying they built shit they didn't I'd gladly hand them a cut-off wheel and welder and see what's up, guarantee they'd end up with a band aid and hurt feelings if I asked em to build a sissy bar from scratch! haha, anyways...Its all about fun and progress, keep it humble and always try to do better, leave the egos at the door. Stop playing dress up and get your hands dirty!I'll call you in ten more years when I think I'm getting the hang of it. ......enough typing for now..... maybe more updates/pix soon, maybe not, if I'm in the garage.